Being brought to a standstill – literally! The power of reframing
On Friday I received the news from my physio that I had fractured my right foot and needed to get into a boot asap. At the time I was in heels on my way to a work event!
I had tripped on an umbrella stand at the beach a few weeks earlier and had developed a mega bruise and thought that was the extent of it and that it would heal naturally.
I had kept charging around my daily live, even trying a run, dancing the night away at a friend’s wedding and kicking a football around with Ethan. After the wedding it felt sore again so thought I had better get it checked out and lucky I did! A lesson to slow down and tune in and listen to your body!
When receiving the news of the fracture the first feelings that came to me were that of overwhelm – how am I going to chase after the boys? Train for the duathlon I’d entered? Power around Sydney for work events and meetings?
Luckily as soon as I arrived at our work event I had a coffee with our wise Tenfold CEO Rich Hirst and he helped me reframe the news. He drew a diagram of underwhelm, whelm and overwhelm which showed I only had to pull back a bit to find my whelm and get back into that zone.
I started thinking of the reframe – it is winter and some more rest would be nice – an opportunity to spend some more time with family and friends – more time for meditation, writing and reading – an opportunity to focus on some swimming (which I can still do). As much as I love running and cycling I thought this isn’t my identity. Suddenly I felt much calmer.
I then had a dress zip malfunction and literally couldn’t move much with the potential for the whole dress to spring open and had to laugh, I’d been brought to a standstill! I thought a sign from the universe to slow down.
After having initially felt a bit down and then with a reframe and sharing a bottle of bubbles with my aunty (and borrowing her boot thank you!) a magical thing happened this weekend. Kind friends and family sent messages of support. My cousin came to pick me up and drove me for afternoon tea, a beautiful fried came and made us dumplings for dinner. I had a coffee catch up with a friend who connected to check in, another friend offered to host a lunch we had been hosting.
I was able accept to surrender and accept love, kindness and help from our community. Sometimes when you are rushing around and powering through everything you don’t create the space for this.
I listened to an ‘Injured’ meditation this morning by Ariel Hardy which I found quite profound. Some of the thoughts included:
- We don’t have to look for a reason in everything and see an injury as a time to heal.
- Think back in your memory to when you became injured and think that did not happen to get rid of the obstacle, that you did not get hung up or thrown off, you walked through and were safe. Retrain the body to feel like that, unwind and rewind what happened, remove the fear from the injury area.
- Give love to your injured area and breathe into it.
- Bend with the wind and see it as an opportunity to embrace change.
- Reframe not as a lesson, yet an opportunity to feel love – a time that can be good for your relationships.
- Don’t get mad at yourself for getting hurt and keep pushing on, open up to being loved and helped. Allow the community to help you, stop and receive.
- Relax and do not fight it, laugh through the moment instead of being so upset that this happened to you which will add to the stress of the body.
- It is popular to look for the lesson in an injury (means I should slow down, am on the wrong path?). Instead use the ‘just heal it’ theory – whatever happens, try and just heal it – you don’t need a big lecture to yourself – it happened, bring love into it and kindness.
- Rest more and exercise in more gentle ways – maybe my body would like that.
- Learn to be good at unplanned change, reroot our plans.
I’m sure there will be some moments of frustration over the next 4-6 weeks of wearing a boot but I vow to try and keep grateful, keep the reframe and laugh and move gracefully through it. Luckily, I have my husband to keep me grounded who is great at keeping perspective and reframing!
I hope by sharing this experience it may help others going through some sort of injury or trauma and find ‘your whelm’. Sending healing thoughts. I’ve also been recommended to read Leigh Sales book which you may find useful – Any Ordinary Day: Blindsides, Resilience and What Happens After the Worst Day of Your Life by Leigh Sales
Dani Matthews 
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Thanks for the share Dani, I especially love ands identify with this reflection you made:
I was able accept to surrender and accept love, kindness and help from our community. Sometimes when you are rushing around and powering through everything you don’t create the space for this.